Don't Mess With Old Ladies

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Don't Mess With Old Ladies







body+parts driving drunk gun hacked killed ladies license murder officer old registration speeding trunk

The following article portrays a very nice visual analogy and an interesting way of looking at attaining your dreams.

Climb Out of That Bucket and Live the Life of Your Dreams

By: Joe Farcht

From birth to adulthood we learn to become good citizens and well-adjusted adults in the world of work and life. Many people make this transformation relatively successfully and lead somewhat normal, happy lives.

Some people make it to adulthood grumbling and blaming the world for all the "bad things" it brings their way including the job they hate. Others can't make the adjustment at all and wind up in prison or dead.

What I'll call the "normal" group - the one that achieves a somewhat happy existence - learns to live by a set of rules, norms, and expectations that often limit their growth, potential, and true greatness.

A few members of this "normal" group discover something special about themselves, make a choice to excel, and take action to create the life of their dreams. They do it without the support of the normal group.

You see, the normal group wants its members to be just normal. By the way, work groups and some families act in the same way. They discourage their members from getting ahead (of the other normal group members).

The Normal Group is Crabby

If you've ever been crabbing, you've seen the "normal" group in action!

You catch crabs by attaching some meat (often a chicken neck) to a long piece of cord and lowering it to the bottom of the bay. Crabs attach themselves to the meat and begin eating. You raise the meat and catch the crabs in a net. Then you throw the crabs into a bucket to keep them from running around the boat and pinching people.

Watch the crabs and you will see that as soon as one crab tries to escape the bucket by climbing out, the other crabs will pull it back down into the bucket. There's no escape from the bucket.

Life is often like that. A person wants to get ahead and knows that there is more to work and life than what they are presently experiencing.

Get Out of the Bucket!

It takes personal leadership to become aware that escaping the normal is possible. It takes personal leadership to choose and commit to creating a better life. It takes personal leadership to take the actions necessary to propel yourself and create the new future you imagine and want.

You can do it. . . All things are possible. Many others in our great land have done it.

Don't let the other crabs in your life prevent you from developing your unique potential and discovering your greatness.

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