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To avoid any confusion I thought it appropriate to list the names (cyber) I go by.
My Names:
Mel Kaye-(my real name), MondayMorningPower,
MMP, Killeris-(Technorati name), Powerkis-(Wordpress name), SiFiBiBi-(Original Blogger name)
Site Names:
Attitude, The Ultimate Power-(Blog name)
MondayMorningPower-(Blog AKA)
It's All About Attitude-(Blog AKA)

My email address: info (at) MondayMorningPower dot Com

Why read Monday Morning Power?

You will find a consistency and a focus in all of my content that can change your attitude which can fuel a positive change in your life, if you want it to. If you are happy with your attitude and your life and see no reason for changing, then you either already have a PMA (Positive Mental Attitude), or you are a victim and want to hold onto your misery. These postings will then serve to fortify the person with PMA, or, hopefully, convince the "victim" that there is a better way. This site will contain essays, poems, stories, humor and links, all with the same goal: The pursuit, capture, care and feeding of a Positive Mental Attitude. I have had readers tell me that they have spent hours on my site and feel great about themselves both during and after. I log onto my own site frequently to help fuel my attitude; I hope you will as well.

To My Fellow Bloggers.....

Please feel free to link my blog to yours. A dose of "Monday Morning Power" would bolster any blog, except for those that profess doom, destruction and the end of the world. If you want to use any of my content in your blog, please ask first via email or by comment. I will need to review your blog for appropriate content and then give you written permission as well as being sure that you link back.

Monday Morning Power

A dose of "Monday Morning Power" and a cup of coffee and you're ready for whatever awaits you. At a minimum you should read this blog on Monday Mornings. However, there will be new posts daily. Whenever you want to feel good, tune in and help yourself to some "Monday Morning Power." Please share this site with everyone you care about. I welcome your comments and suggestions

About Me

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My goal is to help my clients navigate the “residential investment property” market; make some money and have some fun in the process. This real estate market is ripe for the investor. In addition, I would like to help the home buyer and home seller. I am part of an 80,000+ agent network that spans all of North America. Being on the “inside” I can find you the “right” agent to handle your specific needs no matter where in North America you may reside. I have been in and arround the real estate market for most of my professional life and want to be your resource for making money in this market. I have been negotiating all of my life and want to negotiate great deals for you. Following is my contact information and my philosophies: Mel Kaye (Broker Associate) Keller Williams Realty Direct: PCH.MEL.KAYE (724.635.5293) Mobile: 805.300.1769 Fax: 888.371.1190 Email: YESmelYES@gmail.com Website: http://melkaye.com Skype: Mel.Kaye Lic #: 00742678 340 N. Westlake Blvd., Suite 100 Westlake Village, CA 91362


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This Site is dedicated to the development of your ATTITUDE, which is your ULTIMATE POWER. The content includes: Essays, Articles, Poems, Links, Inspirational stories, Quotes, Research, Music, an original series called the "Process" and Laughter....all focused on the
Pursuit, Capture, Care and Feeding of a Positive Mental Attitude.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

"Blogger Burn-Out"

Recently, I have seen a number of prominent bloggers take an extended break or even quit blogging altogether. Some of their comments are: “I just put so much pressure on myself to visit, read and comment on hundreds of blogs per day. I cannot do that anymore,” and “I am simply worn out and burnt out. I am not finding any joy in the process any longer. It has become a chore for me to even think about preparing a post. I am just tired.” I won't mention any names because I do not want to make this about them personally. However, I think that we all know someone who has taken this road.

A common theme seems to be a self imposed pressure to do too much; to reply to every comment, to visit every commenter’s blog, to have to give out every award we are presented as soon as it's presented, to complete every meme that we are tagged with, to feel like we are letting our readers down if we go a day without posting, to feel we have to visit every site that is on our blogroll every week, to feel guilty if we truly have nothing to say, and it goes on. The worst is the feeling that we are disappointing our friends.

Too much self-imposed pressure can do terrible things to us; it can rob us of our passion and steal way the fun. What makes blogging worthwhile is the passion and the fun.

One of the issues that we face, I believe, is that as a group we all have OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) tendencies and blogging exacerbates these. We put far too much pressure on ourselves to perform (guys, does that sound familiar?) And what happens to performance when pressure enters the equation?

Sometimes it's OK to just say that "I have nothing to say today." We will understand. What I don't like to see is the "all or nothing" response to impending "Blogger burn-out." The "all" is the prelude to the "nothing." "All" meaning that we succumb to the pressure and try to do it "all" and that leads to the “burn-out” and possible "break down." "Nothing" meaning we quit; we give up. The end result is the same.

We try to please everybody, and in so doing we lose the sense of who we are. If the blogesphere is not the place to be ourselves, then we have no place.

Personally, I love getting awards. It must be my deprived childhood (LOL.) What I did not like was the pressure to have to turn around and give them out immediately upon acceptance. So I adopted a policy of graciously accepting them into an archived file with acknowledgment and of course a link back. At the end of the month I bring all of the awards for that month to a new post acknowledging that months "blessings." When I am ready, or it feels appropriate, I will give them out. This has alleviated a ton of pressure off of me. As my friends know, when I give out an award it comes from the heart, and not from the pressure.

When it comes to memes, I evaluate them on a case by case basis. If there is value in it, or if it is fun I will play along.

Fortunately, I have yet to run out of things to say or something to post.

I try, key word "try," to visit all my blog-mates once a month. The bogs that I like I visit more frequently. Just because I haven’t visited in a while does not mean that I do not like the author or the blog. Let's face it there are a lot of good blogs out there and it is physically impossible to visit them all.

These are some of my coping devices.

We each need to find our own healthy balance.

Oh yes, and one more thing, inadvertently we put pressure on our friends to respond to our posts, to respond to our comments and comply with our tags. We need to ease up on the expectation. I know that I am as guilty of this as anyone.

I have probably made more blunders and errors than most. It was the kind guidance of my friends that has kept me blogging. For me blogging is unlike anything that I have ever experienced. The passion and fun grow day by day.

There is no easy answer or a right or wrong answer. This is just something that we all have to be aware of.

I would like to get some feedback on this. I believe that we all, at some point in our blogging lives, are hit with potential "burn out." How do you handle it? What pressures do you feel in regards to blogging? How do you cope?



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34 comments:

Sandee said...

Taking a break now and then is a good thing. I do that when I go to the boat. This a 2, 3, or sometimes 4 days without blogging. My husband wanted to buy a laptop so I could blog on the boat. What? No way. I think that's why I'm not burned out.

The pressure comes when I return home. I open the Google reader and there is 350 new messages, sometimes more. Now, I just hit the "mark all as read" and on Monday morning the list is easy to take. If someone has something really important they better leave me an email. None of us can visit everyone, every single day.

I am currently doing a top commentators thing with one of my blogging buddies. I have a post up and you are in the mix. The idea is to count how many comments and by whom during a weeks time. I was surprised at the top commentators. We see the comments, and who from, but when you add the who and how many it really makes you sit back and take notice. Some of those folks that you visit daily only visited me one time that week.

I refuse to feel bad, and when I don't want to blog then I won't. Excellent question Mel. :)

DubLiMan said...

Sandee,
Thanks for you valuable feedback.

In regards to the top commentators concept, I have a real fundamental issue with it. I was also thinking about employing that on my site and decided against it. In my opinion it feeds the quid-pro-quo concept. I do not want to know the number of times I get visited be an friend because I don't want that to influence when, and how often, I visit their site. It throws an artificial aspect into the blogging experience.

Your boat-get-away is perfect; completely getting away from it for a couple of days, in my view, is absolutely ideal.

Twilight said...

That was a thought provoking post, Mel.

I don't get many comments, so that part of the blog scene isn't a problem. Perhaps mine is not really a commenting type of blog, or perhaps nobody cares enough to comment except for one or two "specials".

I am fairly confident that between 30 and 70 people each day at least look at what I've written, and a proportion will have read it in full. That pleases me no end.

I write because I enjoy the challenge, and enjoy the research my posts entail. I hope I might encourage others to learn and research as a result. I like my own posts....LOL! I enjoy going back and reading them. (That probably is very self-absorbed! :-))

I'm glad, in a way, that I don't get lots of comments. For me that would seem almost like a message board or forum - something I was glad to leave. I do visit and comment regularly on two or three blogs myself - and on others if I spot something especially interesting. I think that's good practice, but not to bind oneself to a regular habit which could become obsessive.

I suspect that it's the commenting and responding which is at the root of the problem for most people who feel they must stop blogging, rather than writing the blog entries. It's very understandable.

Sugarqueensdream said...

Mel, I know quite a few Bloggers that are becoming "burned out" lately, I think they may obsess with their blogs to the point of it becoming a chore rather than a joy, I did that at one point when my blog was new. I think for me, it was because I was trying to form an audience and so I felt I had to whip out a post with a yummy dessert every day. It just wasn't the path I should have been on, I didn't know that at the time. I took a month or so break and sat back to regroup, in doing so, I found that my blog had formed into something more personal than just cooking. I find that the best way I have met the challenge of keeping my heart in my Blog is to please me first and others second. I do only the Memes I want, I don't care if the pressure to "perform" is there or not. My Blog is exactly that, MINE. I except awards with the thinking that if "you" give me a gift, it is mine to do with as I please, I have never given a gift in my life, that I've put stipulations on, EVER, period. I think most awards should be given by merit, unless it's a friendship or smile type award, then they are given because of love or friendship or even admiration. I certainly hope that the awards I have been given were not because the "awarder" felt pushed to give it to me. (OMG, I may need therapy now to sort this all out LOL LOL Just Kidding) I think people put too much pressure on others to be the best, to climb in ratings, to comment and to respond to "every" comment and to visit each other EVERY day. Lets face it, there just aren't enough hours in a day to sit and scroll blogs and leave comments to every single person in the Blogosphere....
I fuel around 37 blogs everyday on Fuel my Blog, that takes time, I'm lucky if I get 12 fuels back, DON'T get me wrong, I enjoy it, I do that because I, ME, want to. I think that sometimes you give and you must NOT expect anything in return.
Blogging should ALWAYS be because you love it. A person should also remember Blogging has some responsibilities to it, If you expect to keep an audience, you have to write what you know best and be willing to do this because you love it not because you HAVE to do it. You also must at some point be willing to travel the sphere and leave comments, to let people know they are doing something right, Just do it if you want to not because you have to .....
I think most people don't know when to take a step back and look at the Blog from a different angle, to rethink, regroup and breathe, to remember why they began the journey in the first place.
Be true to yourself always.... Keep it fun, Keep it real, Keep it you. BE THE BLOG.......
(I know that sounded silly but it felt right LOL LOL)
I hope I made sense....
Hugs Sweetie

DubLiMan said...

Twilight,
It seems that you have the main reason for blogging in a healthy perspective.....you do it for you. If we all stick with that perspective there would never be burn-out. However, it almost gets to the point of being competitive, trying to increase your Technorati authority, number of comments, hits, etc.

Thank you for your participation.

DubLiMan said...

Judy,
As I was reading your comments I found myself saying, out loud, "Yes, Yes, Yes." You have a very healthy perspective, but like a lot of us you had to step back and take an objective look at the whole blogging experience. I had a feeling that your response was going to be like this. I know that I don't have to visit your site daily for you to know how deeply I feel for you. Your attitude when it comes to awards is GREAT!!!!!!! "I except awards with the thinking that if "you" give me a gift, it is mine to do with as I please, I have never given a gift in my life, that I've put stipulations on, EVER, period." It was at this point that I began to say YES out loud.

To be quite honest, with the recent burn-outs, I became concerned that others may follow suit. This post was a type of reality check to make sure that the people I care about are all OK. This should also be a warning to new bloggers as to the possible danger signs.

Anonymous said...

Instead of taking something out of my mind on a whim, I rely on the meme's. The meme's get so many responses. Honestly, I somestimes just type a borad response, click and paste, click and paste. I do read them all just dont want to same something wrong. I take 1/2 hour every morning and read as many blogs on that day as I can.

DubLiMan said...

Deb,
Relying on the memes for posts is not a bad idea when one can't think of anything to write. And limiting yourself in regards to how much time you spend on reading other blogs also makes sense. Thanks for sharing.

Amel said...

Hi, Mel,

I LOVE this post. You hit the mark so well! I've seen some blogger friends of mine really getting bogged down.

Hmmm...since I moved to Finland, I had lessons on learning not to expect anything. It hasn't been easy for me, but I turned to blogging because I could get that kind of relationship. After all, blogging is the kind of place where there're no strings attached. If you like a post, then you comment on it. If not, you don't have to comment on it.

You're right about not trying to please everybody. After all, we do have lives other than blogging, and sometimes there are times when we get SO busy in our lives that we just can't seem to spend as much time in the blogosphere.

Recently I've begun to feel the pressure of trying to make money online. I realized that it wasn't good for me, so I really have to focus on what's more important in life. Sure it's good to be able to make money from blogging, but I don't wanna let my life or feelings that day be controlled by it.

I have SO MANY things to be thankful for and I want to make blogging my fun place to be, not a place where I HAVE to do this and that. I don't expect my blogging friends to visit me regularly and I hope my friends don't expect me to do the same, 'coz I don't know how long I can continue doing it (so far I've managed to visit them regularly), esp. if there are more responsibilities in my life (for example: a full-time Finnish course or a baby later on).

I INTEND on enjoying myself blogging. And you're right. There are SO many good blogs out there that it's impossible to visit them regularly. I LOVE your message about OCD and taking the pressure off yourself he he he...I hope lots of bloggers read this he he he...

DubLiMan said...

Hi Amelia,
Each comment on this post is as important as the post itself in how to deal with the pressures that blogging brings on. Your right about lots of bloggers reading this. It will, hopefully, warn them what could happen once the "blogging bug" strikes.

Max Coutinho said...

Hey Mel,

Congratulations!!! This was a marvellous post that reflects most people's thoughts and feelings on blogging-pressure.
I agree with you when you say that doing it "all" will equal to do "nothing" *nodding*.

I had often asked myself how I'd do as my blogroll would increase; and I can tell you that I am one of the lucky ones cause I have a pretty solid method to visit my blogger-friends: daily quota (but like you, there are blogs I visit more often)! I have imposed on myself a quota, otherwise I'd go crazy *nodding*!
For tags, memes and awards I have designed a similar strategy to yours (I only post awards when I have more than 2 to post). Last Thursday I saw myself declining tags for the first time - but I found it a necessary step to take, for all the reasons you stated in your post.

I visit blogs that don't visit mine, I give them my support (when I realise it is someone who is in an emotional need), without expecting nothing in return (cause I understand that people have their personal life, other blogs, and other issues).
I like to get feedback on what I write though, but if I do get it from the few people (Blessed be) that read my articles, I feel quite content already (cause I also have my personal forum at home, who read my posts and debate it every week)!

Now, to answer your questions:

1. How do you handle it? I can't answer this question cause I only started this year, and (Thank God) I haven't reached the "burn-out" point(besides, I offer weekly thoughts, meaning I only post once a week). I think I studied my own SWOT so that I don't burn-out ealier than I should.
2. What pressures do you feel in regards to blogging? Definitely the tags/memes...but now that I have created a plan for this, I think I won't feel it so much.
3. How do you cope? I shoot everything for the weekend. That's how I cope with it. But let's see how I will after this week (I decided that this would be the last week to complete so many tags *nodding*...I will carefully select them, since now I can say that I have completed a sufficient number of them).

This was marvellous Mel, thanks :)!

Cheers

aniceplaceinthesun.blogspot.com said...

Wow, Mel, God bless you for this post. Talk about describe me down to the letters of my name. As a matter of fact, I'm in the process of trying to respond to awards today, and I'm so overwhelmed I'm near tears. I've considered taking a break from blogging several times in the past week. You're right, I just don't want to let anyone down. Thank you for posting advice on how to cope with my blessings. I appreciate you.

Ann

DubLiMan said...

Max,
I like your coping mechanisms! They seem to work well. I also like the weekly post concepts. However, for me, ever since I started blogging, I seem to so much to say that I am currently back-logged. I was thinking of posting 2-3 times a day, but then I realized that that would put undue pressure on me if I ever do run short.

As always, I value your views.

DubLiMan said...

Ann,
With 2 bloggers going "under" recently (I'm sure you know who I am referring to) I was getting concerned as to the overall mood out there. I am also aware, as the holidays approach, that a certain level of frustration and depression can set in. I wanted everyone to be cognoscente of what can happen if they don't learn to cope. It can get totally overwhelming.

You need to put controls on what you do. Judy of "Sugar Queen's Dreams" put it best when she said, "I except awards with the thinking that if "you" give me a gift, it is mine to do with as I please, I have never given a gift in my life, that I've put stipulations on, EVER, period."

stacys1175 said...

Mel,my comment is going to be short but sweet. I enjoy blogging I have'nt found a reson why i like it i look forward to reading everyones post and leaving a comment sometimes i just read and dont comment.and as far as awards i enjoy getting them alot:) hint LOL. I really like dogs.(another hint):) LOL im just like a kid to when it comes to that kind of thing.

Dan Hanosh said...

Yup another OCD . . .
Sometimes I wish I could be normal and yet . . . I do as much as I can. My writing is suffering, books, poetry not blogging. And like everyone I sometimes feel like quiting but then I have a message, a cause to fall back on . . .

But still it becomes sometimes a bit much and then I read a comment or get an award and somehow I just tread on . . . We love it or I guess we'd just stop, but could you?

Dreams are yours to share. Dan

Dreams are yours to share

DubLiMan said...

Stacy,
All hints received lout and clear and deserved.

Thanks for the comments and the participation.

DubLiMan said...

Dan,
I think that most bloggers have a passion for it. If we are following our passion, it becomes almost impossible to stop; but then why would we. Passion is everything, as long as we keep it in control and not fall head-long into burn-out.

stacys1175 said...

THANK YOU VERY MUCH YOUR A SWEETIE AND HUGS TO YOU

Sugarqueensdream said...

Mel Darling, It looks like you've hit the head of the nail again my dear Friend. I love reading some of the thought provoking posts you write, it makes you question things in a way to examine yourself and yet remain positive about life...
Kudos to you my friend.
Hugs, Judy

DubLiMan said...

Stacy,
You are very welcome!!

DubLiMan said...

Judy,
I actually think that your contribution was as important as the post itself. Thank you!!!!!

Sindi said...

I think this was one of your many great posts. I have found myself putting on the pressure about blogging. I always feel bad if I don't make it to friend's blog. I have finally figured out that I can't do it all. I may try but all I do is stress, so I try but if I can't make it to everyone's then they will just have to understand. I am only one person and there are so many great blogs out there and I enjoy trying to read them all HE HE HE HE :)

DubLiMan said...

sindi,
Thanks for your valuable contribution. We just have to realize that "we can't do it all" no matter how much we try.

Baba Doodlius said...

I have discovered how much effort it takes to do the exhaustive research required to present The Truth to all you blog readers out there (all 12 of you, I think). As thigs get hectic around the ol' nest I may not have the time to reveal Secrets of the Univers as often as I would like, rest assured that I will not abandon my quest to enlighten each and every one of you.

And I didn't have the time yet to post your "friendship" thingy yet - but I promise I will! Have a nice day!

DubLiMan said...

Baba,
Your wings must really be tired. And yes, all 12 of us really appreciate your efforts.

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Hey, I liked reading the comments here just as much as the post. Blogging ethics, and exactly "how" you are supposed to conduct yourself in a polite manner are not set for us. There are just so many varied opinions! I see some sites that respond to every comment as they come in, and I wonder just how long is this person sitting in front of the computer. They raise the bar, yet make reponsible blogging seem imposible to those with daily time limits. I "wish" I could be one of those perfect commenting / posting wizards, but reality is that I just can't.
I have a blog because indeed I do find the enjoyment of it, and even though it's an impersonal way of communicating, I feel as if I have met many new "friends" out there. Pressure should not become part of the equation. This is the downfall of anyone that started out happily blogging away, and then it just became too much.

This was a fantastic post. Now I'm going to go out for a bit and get some fresh air! :-)

Speedcat Hollydale

DubLiMan said...

Speedy,
You definitely "got it", the message that is. We have to eliminate the pressure from the equation or burn-out here we come. Some of the comment, including yours, are really insightful.

Unknown said...

There is an ancient Buddhist story:

I man came to the master and said, “I wish to find enlightment. How long will it take me?”

The master replied, “Ten years.”

“And if I apply myself more than any of your other students, how long?”

“Twenty years.”

And if I sit zazen and meditate every hour of the day, how long?”

“Thirty years.”

DubLiMan said...

Nick, You are wise despite your years.

Anonymous said...

Hi Mel and all,
Thanks for bringing up this topic. Perhaps we can all divest ourselves of the guilt of not responding or hitting send or reply for just a day or two.
It's a lot! Happy Thanksgiving!
Judy

DubLiMan said...

Judy,
I think that is a great idea......as I am replying to your comment. Oh well..........LOL

Bobby Revell said...

Thanks for supporting me in a time of need Mel:) Now that I am getting back to my blog I have discovered that my blog content has been stolen 131 times and I have only gone through 1/16th of my site.

Thus...a page rank of zero. It may take YEARS to report the endless sites that have been doing it and my site will remain completely worthless in the eyes of all search engines forever.

I am heartbroken over it and cannot believe how much it has happened. The sites that have stolen my content are very highly ranked some with a PR of 8.

Google is protecting these sites and telling me to buzz off. Now I will have to spend years battling for the ownership of my own material.

How bad can it get? I am at a loss. I do want to thank you for checking on me while many others have turned away. I lost 173 subscribers so far and I'm down to 153 total subscribers. It will not be easy but the people responsible for stealing my content must pay for what they have done.

DubLiMan said...

Bobby,
Just to be clear, what you are saying is that 131 different sites have taken some of your material and claimed it as theirs without asking permission or even linking back to your site? At the same time you have lost 173 subscribers?

I can't comment on what has happened of the resulting PR. However, I can tell you that PR engine has been down for a while. I am also showing no PR rating at this time.

What I can tell you is that what I am hearing from you is dangerous. What I mean by that is that you are allowing it to consume you, "It will not be easy but the people responsible for stealing my content must pay for what they have done." This is a very destructive path that you are traveling.

Also, I can't see a relationship between loosing subscribers and content theft. The probably reason for the loss of subscribers is that you gave every impression that you were leaving blogging forever. You have to take responsibility for the subscriber loss. Continue blogging with passion and "positivity" and your subscriber base will return.

An,d try not to get so hung up on numbers. You know how good you are and we know how good you are.

The most important thing for you at this time is "stay positive," knowing how many people care about you.