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Names I Use

To avoid any confusion I thought it appropriate to list the names (cyber) I go by.
My Names:
Mel Kaye-(my real name), MondayMorningPower,
MMP, Killeris-(Technorati name), Powerkis-(Wordpress name), SiFiBiBi-(Original Blogger name)
Site Names:
Attitude, The Ultimate Power-(Blog name)
MondayMorningPower-(Blog AKA)
It's All About Attitude-(Blog AKA)

My email address: info (at) MondayMorningPower dot Com

Why read Monday Morning Power?

You will find a consistency and a focus in all of my content that can change your attitude which can fuel a positive change in your life, if you want it to. If you are happy with your attitude and your life and see no reason for changing, then you either already have a PMA (Positive Mental Attitude), or you are a victim and want to hold onto your misery. These postings will then serve to fortify the person with PMA, or, hopefully, convince the "victim" that there is a better way. This site will contain essays, poems, stories, humor and links, all with the same goal: The pursuit, capture, care and feeding of a Positive Mental Attitude. I have had readers tell me that they have spent hours on my site and feel great about themselves both during and after. I log onto my own site frequently to help fuel my attitude; I hope you will as well.

To My Fellow Bloggers.....

Please feel free to link my blog to yours. A dose of "Monday Morning Power" would bolster any blog, except for those that profess doom, destruction and the end of the world. If you want to use any of my content in your blog, please ask first via email or by comment. I will need to review your blog for appropriate content and then give you written permission as well as being sure that you link back.

Monday Morning Power

A dose of "Monday Morning Power" and a cup of coffee and you're ready for whatever awaits you. At a minimum you should read this blog on Monday Mornings. However, there will be new posts daily. Whenever you want to feel good, tune in and help yourself to some "Monday Morning Power." Please share this site with everyone you care about. I welcome your comments and suggestions

About Me

My photo
My goal is to help my clients navigate the “residential investment property” market; make some money and have some fun in the process. This real estate market is ripe for the investor. In addition, I would like to help the home buyer and home seller. I am part of an 80,000+ agent network that spans all of North America. Being on the “inside” I can find you the “right” agent to handle your specific needs no matter where in North America you may reside. I have been in and arround the real estate market for most of my professional life and want to be your resource for making money in this market. I have been negotiating all of my life and want to negotiate great deals for you. Following is my contact information and my philosophies: Mel Kaye (Broker Associate) Keller Williams Realty Direct: PCH.MEL.KAYE (724.635.5293) Mobile: 805.300.1769 Fax: 888.371.1190 Email: YESmelYES@gmail.com Website: http://melkaye.com Skype: Mel.Kaye Lic #: 00742678 340 N. Westlake Blvd., Suite 100 Westlake Village, CA 91362


My blog is worth $578,088.96.
How much is your blog worth?

This Site is dedicated to the development of your ATTITUDE, which is your ULTIMATE POWER. The content includes: Essays, Articles, Poems, Links, Inspirational stories, Quotes, Research, Music, an original series called the "Process" and Laughter....all focused on the
Pursuit, Capture, Care and Feeding of a Positive Mental Attitude.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

New Edition of Redneck Jokes

FINALLY! OVERALLS THAT FIT!
Just ask for the " ARKANSAS CUT "


Yes, the new one is out!
Brand new edition of...
"You know you're a redneck when......

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
5. You think "The Nutcracker" is a vice on the work bench
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean ?
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.
24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal*Mart.
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV
26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.
28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.

15 comments:

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Bwahahahahaha, those are good and so is the photograph. Thanks for my first morning laugh. Have a great day Mel. :)

Holy Cuteness said...

OMG, what a big hairy belly! :-P

Monday Morning Power said...

Sandee,
I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Monday Morning Power said...

HC,
A little on the gross side, if you ask me.

Kim said...

he looks very comfortable Mel...
thanks for the humour :)

lilifxt said...

that post is so funny i enjoyed it alot

thank u ...for the smile...:)

wildcatsthree said...

I love it! And that picture - what can I say - it definitely leaves room for expansion. Great photo.
chris

Monday Morning Power said...

Kim,
Comfortable and happy.

Monday Morning Power said...

lilifxt,
Thank you. I have a weak spot for redneck humor.

Monday Morning Power said...

Wildcatsthree,
I think he has the makings for a whole new line of clothing.

Mimi Lenox said...

Oh Lord. This is so not funny. I know people like this!!

Monday Morning Power said...

Mimi,
You have a great way with words, thank you for making me laugh.

Max said...

Hey Mel,

ROFL ROFL ROFL..............
Here are my faves:

"6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture." - LOL LOL
"10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table." - LOL how disgusting!
"11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat." - LOL LOL LOL now that must be quite a sight *nodding*...
"12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list." - LOL damn...
"18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does." - tacky tacky LOL LOL...
"20. You can spit without opening your mouth." - ROFL....
"24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal*Mart." - ROFL *stomach aching of so much laughter*...
"25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV" - LOL LOL this is sick, man *nodding*...
"26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table." - how chic, NOT! LOL LOL...
"29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty." - LOL LOL what? LOL LOL
"30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65." - LOL LOL LOL LOL....*nodding* this is a good one...

Aah, Mel...you kill me, I loved this. I didn't laugh this much at rednecks since I first read redneck jokes here in your blog :)...you still had that yellow header that made me think that you were one of those bike rider rockers LOL LOL..

Have a blessed weekend ;)!

Monday Morning Power said...

Max,
"Bike Rider Rocker"? That yellow header was pretty hideous, wasn't it.

I'm glad you enjoyed these.

Max said...

Mel,

It was a bit odd, yes LOL :)...